Letting Go of Attachment: How to Feel Emotions Without Holding On

In my last post, I talked about embracing emotions without judgment, but there’s another side to emotional freedom: learning to feel without attaching.

Here are six tools that helped me shift from emotional overwhelm to emotional wisdom:

1. Ask Yourself Why You’re Feeling It

Sometimes we spiral without understanding what triggered us. One day I saw a public speaker on TikTok and suddenly felt insecure. My ego wanted to find flaws in them, but deep down, I wasn’t feeling “less than” because of them. I was triggered by my own self-doubt.

The moment I asked, “What about this is making me feel this way?” I could shift.

Awareness breaks the cycle.

2. Name Your Ego

I gave my ego a name. (Yup. A whole name.) It started as a joke, but weirdly… it helped. Suddenly, I wasn’t arguing with myself, I was talking to a familiar part of me that just needed boundaries.

Now when my ego starts spiraling? I call it out the moment it starts. I recognize it for what it is: an old pattern, and I take my power back.

3. Take Accountability

Feelings aren’t always someone else’s fault. If I stew in anger after a fight with my husband, but never speak up? That’s on me. Learning to own my emotional patterns helped me stop blaming and start healing.

4. Understand Where Emotions Come From

Emotions are energy: not evil or bad, not weakness, not “too much.”

When I finally saw them as visitors, not intruders, I stopped fearing them.

They pass through when we stop resisting.

5. Use Affirmations

I used to roll my eyes at affirmations...then I tried them.

And slowly, the loop of obsessive, self-destructive thoughts started to loosen.

Mantras like “I am safe” and “I am enough” gave my brain something better to focus on.

Words rewire our nervous system. Use them.

6. Change Your Thought Frequency

Think of your brain like a radio: you’ve got 60,000 stations a day (seriously, the average brain has 60,000 thoughts per day). If you’re tuned into the “I’m not good enough” channel… it’s time to switch the dial.

Even if it’s just to: “I’m trying, I’m learning, I’m still here.”

When we learn to feel without gripping, we create space for peace.

Let your emotions rise.

Learn from them.

Then? Let them go.

You are not your thoughts.

You are the awareness behind them.